Growing into "Little Men"!

I cant believe that is has been so long since I posted. I know its only been a few days, but that’s long for me. I have really been working on some stresses that I have, and some behavior problems with  my girls (a result of the stress)! So right now I am realizing that I have let Bunny get away with alot of stuff because I want her to have the freedom to grow, but I realize that I have not given her any real boundaries. This has lead to my darling girl turning into a rather angry and selfish girl. Soooo….I need to really crack down and set some clear boundaries. It is not ok to grab things from her sister, or scream when she doesn’t get what she wants…..you get the idea. How did this happen I ask myself. I think that I have gotten confused about what freedoms are good for her and which ones are for me to have until she is ready! Maria Montessori was all about children becoming little men. She thought that they should be working toward independence and that they should always be treated with respect. In my quest for that I have not required her to respect me! She is able to decided too many things and she thinks that she has the power to tell me what to do. She is getting SO bossy, especially to Pup. So I need to show her how to respect, how to care, and how to handle the power of choice she does have responsibly. How do I plan to do that? By giving her the chance to be responsible within her set of boundaries. I have struggled with this plan because I don’t want to go against the beauty of Montessori. Then I found this amazing passage in the Montessori Method.

“As to punishments, we have many times come into contact with children who
disturbed the others without paying any attention to our correction. Such
children were at once examined by the physician. When the case proved to be that
of a normal child, we placed one of the little tables in a corner of the room,
and in this way isolated the child; having him sit in a comfortable little
armchair, so placed that he might see his companions at work, and giving him
those games and toys to which he was most attracted. This isolation almost always
succeeded in calming the child; from his position he could see the entire assembly
of his companions, and the way in which they carried on their work was an object
lesson much more efficacious then any words of the teacher could possibly have
been. Little by little, he would come to see the advantages of of being one of
the company working so busily before his eyes, and he would really wish to go
back and do as the others did. We have in this way led back again to discipline
all the children who at first seemed to rebel against it. The isolated child was
always made the object of special care, almost as if he were ill. I myself, as I
entered the room, went first of all directly to him , caressing him, as if he
were a very little child. Then I would turn my attention to the others,
interesting myself in their work, asking questions about it as if they had all
been little men. I do not know what happened in the soul of these children whom
we found if necessary to discipline, but certainly the conversion was always very
complete and lasting. They showed great pride in learning how to work nd how to
conduct themselves, and always showed a very tender affection for the teacher
and for me.” ~ Maria Montessori, The Montessori Method, Chapter 5

It made me feels so much better about setting the boundaries that Bunny needs. She is a child that wants her world ordered and controled. She needs those boundaries. So I will help her become the “little man” she wants to be by allowing her to have control of the things that she is ready to control, and when she is ready for more, I pass those things to her then!

What do you to help your children grow into “little men”?